COWS!
> > DEMOCRATIC
> >
> >
> > You have two cows.
> > Your neighbor has none.
> > You feel guilty for being successful and give your neighbor the
> > first calf.
> > Barbara Streisand sings for you.
> >
> >
> > REPUBLICAN
> >
> >
> > You have two cows.
> > Your neighbor has none.
> > So?
> >
> >
> > SOCIALIST
> >
> >
> > You have two cows.
> > The government takes one and gives it to your neighbor.
> > You form a cooperative to tell him how to manage his cow.
> >
> >
> > COMMUNIST
> >
> >
> > You have two cows.
> > The government seizes both and provides you with milk.
> > You wait in line for hours to get it.
> > It is expensive and sour.
> >
> >
> > CAPITALISM, AMERICAN STYLE
> >
> >
> > You have two cows.
> > You sell one, buy a bull, and build a herd of cows.
> >
> >
> > BUREAUCRACY, AMERICAN STYLE
> >
> >
> > You have two cows.
> > Under the new farm program the government pays you to shoot one,
> > milk the other, and then pours the milk down the drain.
> >
> >
> > AMERICAN CORPORATION
> >
> >
> > You have two cows.
> > You sell one, lease it back to yourself and do an IPO on the 2nd one.
> > You force the two cows to produce the milk of four cows. You are
> > surprised when one cow drops dead. You spin an announcement to the
> > analysts stating you have downsized and are reducing expenses.
> > Your stock goes up.
> >
> >
> > FRENCH CORPORATION
> >
> >
> > You have two cows.
> > You go on strike because you want three cows.
> > You go to lunch and drink wine.
> > Life is good.
> >
> >
> > JAPANESE CORPORATION
> >
> >
> > You have two cows.
> > You redesign them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow
> > and produce twenty times the milk.
> > They learn to travel on unbelievably crowded trains.
> > Most are at the top of their class at cow school.
> >
> >
> > GERMAN CORPORATION
> >
> >
> > You have two cows.
> > You engineer them so they are all blond, drink lots of beer, give
> > excellent quality milk, and run a hundred miles an hour.
> > Unfortunately they also demand 13 weeks of vacation per year.
> >
> >
> > ITALIAN CORPORATION
> >
> >
> > You have two cows but you don't know where they are.
> > While ambling around, you see a beautiful woman.
> > You break for lunch.
> > Life is good.
> >
> >
> > RUSSIAN CORPORATION
> >
> >
> > You have two cows.
> > You have some vodka.
> > You count them and learn you have five cows.
> > You have some more vodka.
> > You count them again and learn you have 42 cows.
> > The Mafia shows up and takes over however many cows you really have.
> >
> >
> > TALIBAN CORPORATION
> >
> >
> > You have all the cows in Afghanistan, which are two.
> > You don't milk them because you cannot touch any creature's private
> > parts.
> > You get a $40 million grant from the US government to find
> > alternatives to milk production but use the money to buy weapons.
> >
> >
> > IRAQI CORPORATION
> >
> >
> > You have two cows.
> > They go into hiding.
> > They send radio tapes of their mooing.
> >
> >
> > POLISH CORPORATION
> >
> >
> > You have two bulls.
> > Employees are regularly maimed and killed attempting to milk them.
> >
> >
> > BELGIAN CORPORATION
> >
> >
> > You have one cow.
> > The cow is schizophrenic.
> > Sometimes the cow thinks he's French, other times he's Flemish.
> > The Flemish cow won't share with the French cow.
> > The French cow wants control of the Flemish cow's milk.
> > The cow asks permission to be cut in half.
> > The cow dies happy.
> >
> >
> > FLORIDA CORPORATION
> >
> >
> > You have a black cow and a brown cow.
> > Everyone votes for the best looking one.
> > Some of the people who actually like the brown one best accidentally
> > vote for the black one.
> > Some people vote for both.
> > Some people vote for neither.
> > Some people can't figure out how to vote at all.
> > Finally, a bunch of guys from out-of-state tell you which one you
> > think is the best-looking cow.
> >
> >
> > CALIFORNIA CORPORATION
> >
> >
> > You have millions of cows.
> > They make real California cheese.
> > Only five speak English.
> > Most are illegals.
> > Arnold likes the ones with the big udders.

Being interested in politics and economics, this was great.
I emailed it to my brokers, took a copy for my wife and running buds.

Quote:

I don't know about politics, but being interested in cows, I thought it was great. :thumbleft:

Matthew

This thread is just udderly ridiculous.....

Having no interest in cows and cattle generally other than food supply, I found the politcal implications to be funny as hell and right on spot!