Good Morning CGs!

Made a little progress on the car last night. For some reason my wife gets more and more disturbed every time I work on it. I mean, I spent two days straight with her going to Wisconsin and back, but for me to spend a few hours on my car is some horrible things. Ugh. I can't wait til it's done so she'll be off my back about it (and on to another topic...)

Baby woke up with a nasty cough this morning. Didn't have it last night. My wife is considering taking her to the doctor today if it doesn't improve.

Other than that, should be a nice day today. Gonna enjoy the weather.

Hope everyone has a great day!

Matthew

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Don't worry about it Matt. Whatever you do for the rest of your life will never be good enough. I think women must learn that in husband management school. My wife constantly complains that I'm too slow at things. I always tell her she is more than welcome to do it if she likes. She is almost never happy with whatever I do. That's what tells me I must be doing it right.

I would have to agree with Tommy, they learn that someplace and hold it over you all the time. I usually just go ahead and do what I want anyway.

Last day of school today for the kids. No actual classes going on, just a fun day. I'll be glad for the day to be over.

Ahhh, I remember the last day of school was always surreal, hard to believe it was done. You could just feel the weight lifted off of everyone's shoulders.

Beeyoootiful day here, unfortunately I'm stuck indoors. A car slammed into a fire hydrant in Minneapolis, flooding the street. I didn't even know Tiger was in town.

Have a good day, all!

Good Morning Bruthas,

Matt,

Mine does the same thing. Our clothes dryer went on the fritz day before yesterday. We have one of those home warranty plans that she pays for in the event an appliance or something breaks. I called them and filed a claim Monday morning and was told the contractor would be in touch soon (24-48hrs.) Ok I have called three times so far with no contractor yet. This morning I get my ass reamed because the clothes dryer is not fixed yet. I told her to go buy a new one! I don't have time to fart around with the dryer at this timem, otherwise I'd fix it... but that's what she bought the home shield warrantly for.. correct? Hmmmm.... wives...

Hope you have a good wife day!

to have and to hold, over a barrel, from this day forward...

Hope the baby feels better Matt.

I'm pretty lucky with my missus. She lays gentle hints for me to do things but doesn't nag... but the quality of my dinners seems to get worst (that's not easy considering the normal quality!) until she gets what she wants.

Have a good day everyone.

good morning gurus
matt you need to setsome rules down. when rose and i got married 31 years ago i told hear 3 rules and if she agreed then we will get married.
1 we are going to have fun hide and watch
2 we will be friends through thick or thin. with peter out or peter in.
3 the only way we are parting company is feet first. natural caueses or otherwise.
she agreed and everything has been fine.

The only issue that I have with my bride of 39 years is that she thinks I can still do the physical labor like I use to do when were first married. I.E. Build her a new house, furniture,landscaping,and stuff. The only thing she holds over my head is the "bad" influence I have on the neighborhood husbands. Racing lawn tractors etc.

Seniors are gone today! Underclassmen are squirrelly!! we have a faculty cookout today.

Friday we are done!!!

Have a great day guys.

Greetings, Gurus.

I guess this isn't a good place to be if one is a wife. Perhaps I'll leave now.

Word of the Day for Thursday, May 27, 2010

waxing \WAK-sing\, verb:

1. To increase in extent, quantity, intensity or power.
2. (Of the moon) to increase in the extent of its illuminated portion before the full moon.
3. To grow or become.

Waxing - the hobby of choice for many C6 owners.

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Never. This is an open conversation as long as you agree with us. LOL We love ya T.

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Waxing me da same question over and over again.?

Females Rules For Men

1.The female makes the rules.
2.The rules are subject to change by the female at any time without prior
notification.
3.No male can possibly know all the rules. Attempts to document the rules
are not permitted.
4.If the female suspects that the male may know some or all of the rules,
she must immediately change some or all of the rules.
5.The female is never wrong.
6.If the female is wrong, it is because of an egregarious misunderstanding
which was the direct result of something the male did, said, did not do,
or did not say.
7.If rule 6 is invoked, the male must apologize immediately for having
been the cause of the misunderstanding without any clues from the female
as to what he did to have caused the misunderstanding. See rule 13.
8.The female may change her mind at any time for any reason or no reason
at all.
9.The male is never permitted to change his mind or under circumstances
without the express written consent of the female which is given only in
cases where the female wanted him to change his mind but gave no
indication of that wish. See rules 6, 7, 12, and 13.
10.The female has the right to be angry or upset for any reason, real or
imagined, at any time and under any circumstance which in her sole
judgement she deems appropriate. The male is not to be given any sign of
the root cause of the female's being angry or pset. The female may,
however, give false or misleading reasons to see if the male is paying
attention. See rule 13.
11.The male must remain calm at all times, unless the female wants him to
be angry or upset.
12.Under no circumstances may the female give the male any clue or
indication whether or why she wants him to be angry or upset.
13.The male is expected to read the mind of the female at all times.
Failure to do so will result in punishments and penalties imposed at the
sole discretion of the female.
14.The female may, at any time and for any reason, resurrect any past
incident without regard to temporal or spacial distance, and modify,
enlarge, embellish, of wholly reconstruct it in order to demonstrate to
the male that he is now or has in the past been wrong, insensitive,
pig-headed, dense, deceitful, and/or oafish.
15.The female may use her interpretation of any past occurrence to
illustrate the ways in which the male has failed to accord her the
consideration, respect, devotion, or material possessions, he has
bestowed on other females, domestic pets or barnyard animals, sports
teams, automobiles, motorcycles, boats, aircraft, or coworkers. Such
illustrations are non-rebuttable.
16.If the female is experiencing PMS, Post-PMS, or Pre-PMS, the female is
permitted to exhibit any manner of behaviors she wishes without regard to
logical consistency or accepted norms of human behavior.
17.Any act, deed, word, expression, statement, utterance, thought,
opinion, or belief by the male is subject to the sole, subjective
interpretation of the female, other external factors not-withstanding.
Alibis, excuses, explanations, defenses, reasons, extenuations, or
rationalizations will not be entertained. Abject please for mercy
and forgiveness are acceptable under some circumstances,
especially when accompanied by tangible evidence of contrition. :-))

Women's 50 Rules For Dealing With Men

Do not say what you mean. Ever.
Be ambigious. Always.
Cry. Cry often. Tell them it's their fault.
Bring things up that were said, done, or thought years, months, or weeks ago. Get mad when they don't remember.
Make them apologize for everything.
Stash feminine products in their backpacks and in their books as cute reminders that you were thinking of them.
Gossip. Gossip about everything that walks.
Play Alanis Morissette's "You Outta Know," loud. Look at them. Smile.
Look them in the eye and start laughing.
Cry.
Get mad at them for everything.
Discuss your period in front of them. Watch them squirm.
Hold grudges.
Demand to be e-mailed. Often. Whine when they don't comply.
When complimented, make sure to be paranoid. Take nothing at face value.
Use daddy as a weapon. Tell them about his gun collection, his quick trigger finger, and his affection for his "little princess."
Be late for everything. Yell if they're late.
Talk about your ex-boyfriend 24-7. Compare and contrast.
Go everywhere in groups, especially the bathroom. Do nothing alone. Independence is a sign of weakness.
Cry.
Make them guess what you want and then get mad when they're wrong.
Plan little relationship anniversaries, i.e. the monthly anniversary of the time you saw each other in the library...for five minutes. Then get mad at them for forgetting. Then cry.
Fall for your FAC.
Gather many female friends and dance to "I Will Survive" while they are present. Sing all the words. Sing to them. Sing loud.
Correct their grammar.
Constantly claim you're fat. Ask them. Then cry, regardless of their answer.
Leave out the good parts in stories.
Make sure to only be interested in guys in the same friendship group. Make sure to cause trouble.
Make them wonder. Confusion is a good thing.
Cry.
Declare that you are not wacko.
Criticize the way they dress.
Criticize the music they listen to.
Criticize their hair.
Ignore them. When asked, "What's wrong?" tell them that if they don't know, you're not going to tell them.
Try to change them.
Try to mold them.
Try to get them to dance.
Pretend you're interested, lead them on, then feign ignorance when confronted.
Cry.
When they screw up, never let them forget it.
Make them stay at religious services until they are close to fainting. Just because.
Blame everything on PMS.
Blame everything on PMS only after it has been blamed on them.
Whenever there is silence ask them, "What are you thinking?"
Get mad if they don't notice a haircut. Even if it's only a half inch.
Read into everything.
Over-analyze everything.
Cry.
Make it your goal to make them cry

Men's Rules For Dealing With Women

Don't call. Ever.
Lie.
If you don't like a girl, don't tell her. It's more fun to let her figure it out by herself.
Be as ambiguous as possible.
If you lose something that belongs to someone else, tell them you mailed it to them.
No matter what, it isn't your fault.
Never ask for help. Even if you really, really need help.
Women like it when you ignore them.
If you hurt someone, pretend you care. Don't.
Tell her you will call. Then, refer back to rule #1.
Deny everthing. Everything.
Use the best break up line, "It's not you, it's me".
Don't have a clue. If you get a clue, pretend you didn't and disregard it.
Feelings? What feelings?
"Love" is not in your vocabulary. Don't even think about saying it.
ALWAYS apologize. NEVER mean it.
It's OK if you forget trivial things, like your girlfriend's birthday and eye color.
Ignorance solves problems. If you can't see them, they can't see you.
It is never your duty to take responsibility for your actions.
Don't ever notice anything.
If you cheat on a girl, but no one finds out, then technically you've done nothing wrong.
If the question begins with "why", the answer is "I don't know".
If you ever find yourself in a position where you have been proven wrong, blame others.
If anyone asks you for a favour -
(a) make a big deal about how hard it is for you to do it;
(b) remind them of this huge favor you've done for them at least every day for the rest of their life.
Lie.

Finally, the guys' side of the story.
We always hear "the rules" from the Female side.
Now here are the rules from the Male side.
These are our rules!

Please note.. These are all numbered "1" ON PURPOSE!

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1. Men are NOT mind readers.

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1. Shopping is NOT a sport. And no, we are never going to think of it that way.

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1. Crying is blackmail.

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1. Ask for what you want.
Let us be clear on this one:
Subtle hints do not work!
Strong hints do not work!
Obvious hints do not work!
Just say it!

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1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.

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1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That's what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.

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1. A headache that lasts for 17 months is a Problem. See a doctor.

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1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument. In fact, all comments become null and void after 7 Days.

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1. If you won't dress like the Victoria's Secret girls, don't expect us to act like soap opera guys.

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1. If you think you're fat, you probably are. Don't ask us.

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1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one.

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1. You can either ask us to do something Or tell us how you want it done.
Not both. If you already know best how to do it, just do it yourself.

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1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercial breaks, not when the movie starts.

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1. Christopher Columbus did NOT need directions and neither do we.

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1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings.
Peach, for example, is a fruit, not a color. Pumpkin is also a fruit.
We have no idea what mauve is.

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1. If we ask what is wrong and you say "nothing," we will act like nothing's wrong.
We know you are lying, but it is just not worth the hassle.

************

1. If you ask a question you don't want an answer to, expect an answer you don't want to hear.

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1. When we have to go somewhere, absolutely anything you wear is fine. Really.

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1. Don't ask us what we're thinking about unless you are prepared to discuss such topics as baseball, the shotgun formation, automotive, or golf.

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1. You have enough clothes.

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1. You have too many shoes.

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1. I am in shape. Round IS a shape!

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1. Thank you for reading this.

Yes, I know, I have to sleep on the couch tonight; It's alright. You know, sleeping on a couch is like camping to us. So we're perfectly fine. It's kind of a vacation. Right.

No I do not have to much time on my hands. These lists actually cut into my nap time.

You're too much, Tommy! =)

An elderly couple, who were both widowed had been going out with each other for a long time. Urged on by their friends, they decided it was finally time to get married.

Before the wedding, they went out to dinner and had a long conversation regarding how their marriage might work. They discussed finances, living arrangements and so on.

Finally, the old gentleman decided it was time to broach the subject of their physical relationship.

"How do you feel about sex?' he asked, rather tentatively.

"I would like it infrequently," she replied.

The old gentleman sat quietly for a moment adjusted his glasses, leaned over towards her and whispered, "Is that one word or two?"

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Where did you find that one? In the AARP magazine? LOL