Good morning gang.

Well it's Friday again the end of another week.

Still cold here and I think that should be the norm until spring. We're suppose to get some snow tonight and tomorrow. Temps today here in N.E. Indiana should reach the mid 20's.

Word of the Day Friday, December 13, 2013

umbriferous\ uhm-BRIF-er-uhs \, adjective;

1. casting or making shade.

Origin:

Umbriferous comes from the Latin word umbra meaning "shade," and is related to the word "umbrella."


If you ever wondered about the work Xmas check it out here.

Ish haal issbaah

Good Morning CGs!

Friday the 13th! Better be careful out there. Supposed to be slightly warmer here today, something like 31. It's a heat wave.

I still have one more Xmas present to get, a massage gift certificate for the wife. I already picked up a few other things for her. How is everyone else coming along?

Hope everyone has a great day!

Matthew

Morning guys....it was an exciting ball game that my #1 GS had last night. Won on a last second shot. See yesterdays chat for more info. That puts us in the semi-final round of the tourney tonight, so we will be headed south for that one.

Last "normal" Friday for us before Christmas. Only two days of normal classes next week and then three days of finals. Going to be a quick week.

I'm done with shopping for Christmas.

Guess what I bought at Summit yesterday.

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A new hat?

http://www.summitracing.com/parts/sum-p33705/overview/

Happy Friday, Gurus! It's semi-balmy here, temps in the teens. I'm starting to yearn for Puerto Vallarta.

Have a good day, all!

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No, 2 rolls of sandpaper.

How many midgets does it take to change a light bulb?

An old man lay sprawled across three entire seat in the movie theater.

When the usher came by and noticed this, he whispered to the old man, "Sorry Sir, but your only allowed one seat".

The old man didn't budge.

The usher became more impatient. "SIR, if you don't get up from there I', going to have to call the manager.

Once again the old man just muttered and said nothing.

The usher marched briskly back up the isle, and in a moment he returned with the manager. Together the two of them tried repeatedly to remove the old disheveled man, but with no success.

Finally they summoned the police.

The responding officer surveyed the situation briefly then asked, "
all right buddy whats your name?"

Fred, the old man moaned.

"Where ya from Fred?" asked the police officer.

With a terrible grunt in his voice, and without moving, Fred replied......
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The balcony"

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1. Midgets own ladders too.

Uh.....3 midgets...one to hold the lightbulb and the other two to turn the midget.....I don't know....is this a trick question....?

Ha Ha on the old man joke.......it kinda made me laugh..I'm not quite awake since I slept in this morning...

It's Friday but now I can't go out because Matt says its the 13th......nuts.....

Big Atta Boy to your GS Tom...sounds like the kids a player....

Today is more work and I have to start thinking about what I am going to get everyone for Christmas.....I know what I want for Christmas so I better start ordering the Vette stuff.......can't tell or it would ruin the suprise....

What do you guys want for Christmas other then world peace and the cure for all sickness......? Bill wants more sandpaper....

Garbage day better start getting it out to the dumpster....have a holly jolly day Guru's....

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Yea,
1. And maybe a stepladder, they’re short, not retarded,

Sandpaper replenishment

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The rolls I got have pressure adhesive on one side.

Maybe I can stick the stuff to my forehead and sand like this:

gona be a bad joke day here

Silly Sally was in the bath tub and a man jumped in with her. She just laugh and laugh . She knew there were 2 bars of soap.

Got an email from FedX

They're delivering wine to the house today.

But someone has to sign for it.

There goes my afternoon casino relaxation.

Humm, I must have at least one good relative.

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Yes it is.

First Christmas Joke....

Three men died on Christmas Eve and were met by Saint Peter at the pearly gates.

'In honor of this holy season' Saint Peter said, 'You must each possess something that symbolizes Christmas to get into heaven.'

The Englishman fumbled through his pockets and pulled out a lighter. He flicked it on. 'It's a candle', he said.

'You may pass through the pearly gates' Saint Peter said.

The Scotsman reached into his pocket and pulled out a set of keys. He shook them and said, 'They're bells.'

Saint Peter said 'You may pass through the pearly gates'.

The Irishman started searching desperately through his pockets and finally pulled out a pair of women's panties.

St. Peter looked at the man with a raised eyebrow and asked, 'And just what do those symbolize?'


The paddy replied, 'These are Carols.'

Got up and ran out to have some fasting blood work. I usually make an appointment but I figured I'd do a walk in. Lucked out. They weren't too busy. Took my 83 911 for the ride. It was happy to be out. Had to buy a new pool pump for the other house. This morning I'll do the install. Hopefully all will go as planned. We had a cool down last night. Felt nice. It's funny, when it's cold/cool outside I like the house around 78 and when it's warm outside I like the house around 75. 68 to 78 are my optimum outdoor living temperatures. Those are my favorite days of the year, especially if the skies are blue.

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I hate that, no coffee with half & half until you get done.

But they open at 8 a.m.

And my Thermos broke.

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The sky is bluer here.

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Ya, that's the dilemna. I don't like to do ANYTHING till I've had my coffee. Even after Hurricane Andrew, first thing was to make coffee upon rising. I was well prepared for the storm. I never ran out of coffee, beer or cigarettes. That's preparation my friends.

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And your balls are probably bluer too.

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Only when I soak em in wine.

And I'm 5,000 feet closer to the sky than U.

Ah crap, we're back on Elvis again.

Since Blue seems to be the theme of the day, here is my contribution:

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CLOUDY AND MISTING RAIN THIS MORNING, STILL LOTS OF THAT NASTY WHITE STUFF LAYING AROUND BUT IT'S 40 DEGREES SO THAT'S AN IMPROVEMENT.

DRIVEN BY CABIN FEVER AND THE NEED FOR A HAIRCUT,I WENT TO FIRE UP THE PICKUMUP TRUCK BUT ALAS AND ALACK, THERE WAS NO FIRE TO BE HAD. BATTERY WAS DEAD AS A HAMMER, NOT EVEN ANY LIGHTS ON THE DASH. FROZE TO DEATH, I SUSPECT. NOT ENTIRELY UNEXPECTED, AS IT WAS THE ORIGINAL BATTERY. AT 92K MILES AND FIVE PLUS YEARS I GUESS I GOT MY MONEY'S WORTH OUT OF IT.

That blue Santa reminded me of this classic.

Snow forecast tonight is 1-6 inches. Glad they are so exact.....

I wouldn't mind some summertime blues about now......

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Brad...I see you have been going to your happy place again....Nice!

http://news.msn.com/crime-justice/man ... blow-up-airport-in-kansas


Weirdo.......

This guy must be from Reno .........

That song would sound a lot more relevent if I drank a fifth of Jack. Then I could cry right along with him .........

Blue

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Best Blue

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Florida Blue Laws

Florida (accidentally) banned all computers and smart phones in internet cafes



The term “motor vehicle” was revised to exclude swamp buggies, deregulating the primary mode of transportation in the state.


Repealed It is illegal for a doctor to ask a patient whether they own a gun.


The state constitution allows for freedom of speech, a trial by jury, and pregnant pigs to not be confined in cages.



One may not commit any “unnatural acts” with another person.



Unmarried couples may not commit “lewd acts” and live together in the same residence.


Corrupting the public morals is defined as a nuisance, and is declared a misdemeanor offense.


Doors of all public buildings must open outwards.

About this law.

It is illegal to sell your children.


It is considered an offense to shower naked.

You are not allowed to break more than three dishes per day, or chip the edges of more than four cups and/or saucers.

Women may be fined for falling asleep under a hair dryer, as can the salon owner.

Oral sex is illegal.

A special law prohibits unmarried women from parachuting on Sunday or she shall risk arrest, fine, and/or jailing.

You may not kiss your wife’s breasts.

If an elephant is left tied to a parking meter, the parking fee has to be paid just as it would for a vehicle.

Penalty for horse theft is death by hanging.

It is illegal to sing in a public place while attired in a swimsuit.

Men may not be seen publicly in any kind of strapless gown.

Having sexual relations with a porcupine is illegal.

Blue Disc

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Blue Hell

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The only one on that list I agree with is the horse theft hanging one.....string em up.....